Funeral Message Online

Following some request I have posted the print version of the funeral message for my brother. It is basically complete except for the gospel proclamation at the end.
I have been delayed in getting this up due some technical issues, and that has caused me to reflect on the fact that it has finally, in full form, gone up just as we get to Reformation Day. It seems to me appropriate in a few ways.

1. Doug had a great appreciation for the Reformation and the truths recovered there.
2. In fact some of these Reformation truths were what he most liked to talk about.
3. One of the last things he did was to order study bibles drawing from the Reformation for his daughters.
4. The truth of justification by faith, far from merely an academic, abstract doctrine, is a central ground of comfort in the light of death.
“to the one who does not work but believes in him who justifies the ungodly, his faith is counted as righteousness” (Rom 4:5)

Teaching People to Die Well

Justin Wainscott and Matt Crawford have recently posted helpful items on the importance of theology for helping us to live and die well. Justin reflected on the first two question s of the Heidelberg Catechism in light of preparation for a funeral and Matt quoted the trial of several early Christian martyrs in North Africa.

Both of these brought back to mind a comment from J. I. Packer in the recently released volume of essays on his life and work, J. I. Packer and the Evangelical Future: The Impact of His Life and Thought. In Packer’s response essay he wrote:

“ ‘Our people die well,’ said John Wesley somewhere, commending Methodist Christianity. Dying well, as the final climactic step in living well, was a prominent theme in older Roman Catholic, Protestant, and Orthodox teaching on the Christian life and in some places may still be so. But in the West death has become the great unmentionable, like sex in Victorian times, and little is taught to Christians in these days about preparing for it. Instead, we live as if we shall be here forever, and very many churchpeople, one fears, have matched the self-protective young man in Charles Williams’s Many Dimensions who ‘passed . . . a not unsuccessful life in his profession, and the only intruder he found himself unable to cope with was death.’ This being so, and knowing as we do that life in this world is a terminal condition, it is surely most important that our catechesis should promote readiness for dying. When the late Dag Hammarskjold wrote that only one who knows how to die can know how to live, he was absolutely right, and our churches are much at fault in having forgotten it.” (177)

These are reminders of important truths. As pastors, our teaching and preaching is not merely abstract. We must keep in mind that we are preparing people to live well and ultimately to die well. We will all die. Let us prepare to do so well.

Maxwell on Ministry to Widow(er)s

My friend and fellow pastor, B J Maxwell, has written a wonderful and powerful exhortation on ministering to those who have lost a spouse titled, Cry for Her Now (or Thoughts on Ministry to Widow(er)s). He rightly notes the biblical mandate for this ministry (and how we might tend to avoid it) and then gives wise counsel on how to do this well.

This article is full of wisdom well-put. I cannot adequately summarize it here but will simply cite one paragraph to give you a feel for it.

Lesson: Learn to be a better husband from men who aren’t anymore. There is great benefit from the flood of new marriage books on the market. Slick covers depicting Tintselesque couples helping suburban families navigate the American dream. Read them, learn from them, practice them. But then go sit down with a Christian man who served his wife faithfully for decades but now sleeps alone. Watch him cry. Listen to him laugh. See his pictures. Enjoy his stories (again!). Imitate his faith. Make sure the thought of your wife makes you cry now so that you can cry without regret later.

I encourage you to take time to read the entire post and reflect on it.

Death of a Brother

My family and I have been blessed by the care of many people in this last week as we have dealt with the death of my older brother, Doug. We have seen the church in action, our church, my parents’ church and many others, including the Union University community.

We are grateful, and God has been faithful.
For the funeral, I gathered a lengthy Scripture reading from the Psalms believing the Psalms give us words for expressing grief, and in the midst of the grief finding hope in the character of God. I told the family I would pass on the reading, so I post it here as one step to accomplish that.

142:1 With my voice I cry out to the Lord;
with my voice I plead for mercy to the Lord.
2 I pour out my complaint before him;
I tell my trouble before him.
3 When my spirit faints within me,
you know my way!
…
5 I cry to you, O Lord;
I say, “You are my refuge,
my portion in the land of the living.”
6 Attend to my cry,
for I am brought very low!

38:8 I am feeble and crushed;
I groan because of the tumult of my heart.
9 O Lord, all my longing is before you;
my sighing is not hidden from you.
10 My heart throbs; my strength fails me,
and the light of my eyes—it also has gone from me.…
15 But for you, O Lord, do I wait;
it is you, O Lord my God, who will answer. …
17 For I am ready to fall,
and my pain is ever before me. …
21 Do not forsake me, O Lord!
O my God, be not far from me!
22 Make haste to help me,
O Lord, my salvation!

143:4 my spirit faints within me;
my heart within me is appalled.
5 I remember the days of old;
I meditate on all that you have done;
I ponder the work of your hands.
6 I stretch out my hands to you;
my soul thirsts for you like a parched land. Selah
7 Answer me quickly, O Lord!
My spirit fails!…
8 Let me hear in the morning of your steadfast love,
for in you I trust.
Make me know the way I should go,
for to you I lift up my soul.

17:8 Keep me as the apple of your eye;
hide me in the shadow of your wings,
22:11 Be not far from me,
for trouble is near,
and there is none to help.
22:19 But you, O Lord, do not be far off!
O you my help, come quickly to my aid!
34:4 I sought the Lord, and he answered me
and delivered me from all my fears.

73:23 [You, O Lord, are continually with me];
you hold my right hand.
24 You guide me with your counsel,
and afterward you will receive me to glory.
25 Whom have I in heaven but you?
And there is nothing on earth that I desire besides you.
26 My flesh and my heart may fail,
but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.

40:1 I waited patiently for the Lord;
he inclined to me and heard my cry.
2 He drew me up from the pit of destruction, out of the miry bog,
and set my feet upon a rock,making my steps secure.
3 He put a new song in my mouth,a song of praise to our God.
Many will see and fear,and put their trust in the Lord.

46:1 God is our refuge and strength,
a very present help in trouble.
2 Therefore we will not fear though the earth gives way,
though the mountains be moved into the heart of the sea,
3 though its waters roar and foam,
though the mountains tremble at its swelling.
11 The Lord of hosts is with us;
the God of Jacob is our fortress.

Gospel in the Hospital

Since my boys are studying the War Between the States I have read a number of books on the subject this past Fall to supplement our discussions. I came across a book published in 1957 by Broadman Press titled, Chaplains in Gray, written by Charles Pitts. It was a fascinating look at the work of pastors and chaplains in the war.

In one place Pitts quoted at length from A Letter to the Chaplains in the Army by James O. Andrew, a Methodist Episcopal bishop from Georgia. This letter contains much good advice from an aged minister. The following excerpt is a good exhortation for all of us on the importance of ministering in times of sickness and death.

It may be that the circumstances which surround you may offer but few facilities for public preaching, but remember that the pulpit is not the only place where the faithful pastor will preach—in private, by the wayside, in the tent, in the hospitals by the bedside of the sick or wounded soldier; there especially is your place.

Be much with the sick, wounded, and dying—there, while life is ebbing out, when the past is painfully remembered, and the future looms up gloomily before the vision of the dying patriot, when he thinks of home and loved ones there, and feels that his earthly mission is almost ended, then preach Jesus to him, talk to him of the cross and pardon, and of heaven, and kneel beside him, and in the language of pleading, earnest faith, commend his departing spirit to the God who made him, and the exalted Redeemer who died for him, rose again, and ever liveth to intercede for him, and then, when the vital spark is extinct, give him Christian burial. (50-51)