Funeral Message by Eric Smith

Eric Smith has posted the audio of the message he preached at his grandfather’s funeral a couple of weeks ago. I was privileged to hear this message in person, and I commend it you. It is helpful in several ways. First, it is a moving tribute to the impact of a man’s life on those in his family. I was deeply moved and yearned all the more to lead my family well.

Also, it is a good example of a funeral message. Funeral messages can be a real challenge. Eric’s grandfather is a believer so that helps greatly. Often, though, I talk with pastors who seem hesitant to highlight the grace of God evident in the lives of people. In an effort not to substitute the praise of man for the praise of God, we can forget that we see the grace of God by what He does through people. Eric recounts various ways God blessed him through his grandfather all the while pointing out that every good gift comes from God.

I am thankful this message was recorded and is now available. I requested it that very day, and now I commend it to you.

Death of a Brother

My family and I have been blessed by the care of many people in this last week as we have dealt with the death of my older brother, Doug. We have seen the church in action, our church, my parents’ church and many others, including the Union University community.

We are grateful, and God has been faithful.
For the funeral, I gathered a lengthy Scripture reading from the Psalms believing the Psalms give us words for expressing grief, and in the midst of the grief finding hope in the character of God. I told the family I would pass on the reading, so I post it here as one step to accomplish that.

142:1 With my voice I cry out to the Lord;
with my voice I plead for mercy to the Lord.
2 I pour out my complaint before him;
I tell my trouble before him.
3 When my spirit faints within me,
you know my way!
…
5 I cry to you, O Lord;
I say, “You are my refuge,
my portion in the land of the living.”
6 Attend to my cry,
for I am brought very low!

38:8 I am feeble and crushed;
I groan because of the tumult of my heart.
9 O Lord, all my longing is before you;
my sighing is not hidden from you.
10 My heart throbs; my strength fails me,
and the light of my eyes—it also has gone from me.…
15 But for you, O Lord, do I wait;
it is you, O Lord my God, who will answer. …
17 For I am ready to fall,
and my pain is ever before me. …
21 Do not forsake me, O Lord!
O my God, be not far from me!
22 Make haste to help me,
O Lord, my salvation!

143:4 my spirit faints within me;
my heart within me is appalled.
5 I remember the days of old;
I meditate on all that you have done;
I ponder the work of your hands.
6 I stretch out my hands to you;
my soul thirsts for you like a parched land. Selah
7 Answer me quickly, O Lord!
My spirit fails!…
8 Let me hear in the morning of your steadfast love,
for in you I trust.
Make me know the way I should go,
for to you I lift up my soul.

17:8 Keep me as the apple of your eye;
hide me in the shadow of your wings,
22:11 Be not far from me,
for trouble is near,
and there is none to help.
22:19 But you, O Lord, do not be far off!
O you my help, come quickly to my aid!
34:4 I sought the Lord, and he answered me
and delivered me from all my fears.

73:23 [You, O Lord, are continually with me];
you hold my right hand.
24 You guide me with your counsel,
and afterward you will receive me to glory.
25 Whom have I in heaven but you?
And there is nothing on earth that I desire besides you.
26 My flesh and my heart may fail,
but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.

40:1 I waited patiently for the Lord;
he inclined to me and heard my cry.
2 He drew me up from the pit of destruction, out of the miry bog,
and set my feet upon a rock,making my steps secure.
3 He put a new song in my mouth,a song of praise to our God.
Many will see and fear,and put their trust in the Lord.

46:1 God is our refuge and strength,
a very present help in trouble.
2 Therefore we will not fear though the earth gives way,
though the mountains be moved into the heart of the sea,
3 though its waters roar and foam,
though the mountains tremble at its swelling.
11 The Lord of hosts is with us;
the God of Jacob is our fortress.

E. V. Hill, His Wife's Funeral

As part of the pastoral labor my wife and I do a fair bit of pre-marital counseling. As we were doing some more of such counseling this Fall I remembered hearing, while in college, a recording of Pastor E. V. Hill preaching his wife’s funeral. It was a powerful sermon filled with insight and anecdotal wisdom on marriage and parenting. Since I have lost the tape I had of the sermon I searched youtube and was delighted to find that the sermon is available there. It is found in two parts and is well worth listening to.

The sermon was preached in 1987 and is titled “My Wife’s Death in Biblical Perspective.” His text was Job 1:21, “The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away. Blessed be the name of the Lord.” Throughout the sermon he refers to his wife with the name he called her, “Baby.” He explains at the beginning of the sermon that he did not choose to preach her funeral to display special strength; rather, he said, “I stand fulfilling a task my member asked of me.” His wife, one of his church members, asked him to preach her funeral so he did so.

The first part of the sermon (all of part 1 and into part 2) Hill expounds “The Lord giveth” in reference to his wife as a gift from God. He said, “In my wife He gave a great gift.” Along the way he acknowledged the labors of his wife’s parents in raising a godly pure woman. In this section he digresses to talk about parents’ (especially fathers’) roles in selecting spouses for their children (about 2:55-6:50 in part 1). The story of him turning away from his door a young man who had come to see his daughter is classic. It is a good example of fathering well and is humorously told. Hill told the congregation plainly, “some of these relationships have to be broken up!” This was no passive fathering! He also said, “You can’t get no race horses out of mules!” He goes on to encourage male headship and to extol the femininity of his wife.

At the end of Part 1 and beginning of Part 2 (you can just pick up at the beginning of Part 2) he tells a couple of stories to illustrate his statement, “She was my protector.” These stories move me even as I listen to them for the 50th time. He tells about a time when he took on a business venture that she had warned against and then he lost a large sum of money in it. She did not berate him or hold it over his head. Rather, in a very touching way she extolled his virtues rather than his failings. At another time when they did not have enough money she did not complain but tried to obscure the fact that their lights had been cut off by setting up a candle light dinner. Of these instances he stated: “She could have broken me at that point. … she could have broken my spirit … and demoralized me.” But instead she supported him and believed in him. There is also the story of how she sought to protect him from a death threat by placing herself in the way (you’ll have to listen to it).

Lastly, he takes up “the Lord taketh away” (about 4:30 in Part 2) making the important point that a sign of Christian maturity is being able to say “Blessed be the name of the Lord” not only when the Lord gives but also when He takes away. This is such an important point. Then as he repeatedly shouts “Blessed,” it seems to me that he is right there practicing what he is preaching, blessing the Lord in that moment acknowledging that the Lord had indeed taken away the wonderful gift He had given in Mrs. Hill. The sermon closes in a moving anticipation of heaven.

I could listen to this sermon over and over. It means a lot to me for various reasons not least because I have been blessed with a wife who has supported me in similar ways. This model and message needs to be shared. So I encourage you to listen to this sermon and pass it along to others.